Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Internal Conflict Blog Fest

I've never done a blog fest before, but when the awesome Jessica announced the Internal Conflict Blog Fest, I had to join in.

Here's a scene from my current WiP, "Lipstick in the Boardroom".
On the way back, Dipesh dumped his laptop on the front seat, and stretched his hand out on the back of the seat. Try as she might, she couldn’t ignore the implication behind the gesture any more. Dipesh hadn’t just put his hand behind the seat because it was comfortable. He had put it there to force her to make a decision. The gesture was at the same time an invitation and a challenge. Revathi knew she had to make the next move. She could either pretend she didn’t understand what he was implying, and ignore it. Or she could respond. Every rational thought she was capable of told her to ignore it- ‘Dipesh is a colleague and a friend’, she told herself. “Leave it as it is. Don’t complicate things by introducing something new into the equation.’
But she couldn’t deny the fact that Dipesh’s proximity was doing things to her. She wanted him. She really did. Try as she might, she couldn’t ignore the electric sparks flying between them. Just knowing he was so close to her made her want to draw his body to hers. She wanted him. That she couldn’t deny. But did she want to deal with the complications that would arise later?
She stared out of the window, concentrating on a blue flap of tarpaulin fluttering from a solitary balcony on an unfinished skyscraper. If she stared hard enough, would that patch of blue give her the answers she was seeking?
"Forget it", she told herself sternly. "Flirting with him was fun, but would you be able to continue working with him if you let yourself do something foolish now?"
“What are you thinking?” Dipesh broke into her thoughts.
“Nothing. Nothing in particular.” Revathi’s voice was hoarse. Dipesh was affecting her in ways she had not thought possible.
"That's enough", she cautioned herself. "Besides, don't forget you are already engaged to someone else." The cab went over a pothole. They were both thrown about, and Dipesh's hand brushed against her bare neck.
"Sorry", he said, though he looked anything but contrite.
"That's okay. It was an accident", she muttered, but the catch in her voice gave her feelings away. Dipesh held her gaze, his look was a command. Revathi looked away. This way or that, things were going to get complicated. She reached a decision. She knew what she was going to do was fraught with danger, but sometimes you just had to take a couple of risks.
"Revathi, you have been a good girl for 28 years. Don't spoil all that now. Please." She ignored her inner voice, and reached out to pull his hand down over her shoulder. She stared straight ahead for a few minutes, her fingers twined through his, then turned around to face him. Her eyes sought his, there was a ghost of a smile playing about her lips. His eyes locked into hers. She mirrored the smile he gave her, and looked away again. Her fingers continued to play with his. She bent down and planted a light kiss on his fingers, then started ahead contently, letting her fingers do the talking.
“Kiss?”. His voice was barely above a whisper.
She nodded almost imperceptibly. His lips sought hers. She surrendered to the pleasure.
“First time?”, he asked when they broke apart. She nodded; she didn’t trust herself to say anything. “Again?”, his eyes seemed to ask. It was much longer this time, and Revathi didn’t want to let go of him even after their lips parted. She rested her head on his shoulder, and let him stroke her hair.

22 comments:

The Alliterative Allomorph said...

Wow! That gave me shivers! What an amzing scene. It was so very intense and I could feel your MC's inner conflicts on the surface of my skin. *shudder* Aside from a few word repetitions, which is a very minor detail, this was very well written in my opinion! I was immersed in the scene instantly. I was sitting in the back seat. I could feel the warmth of Dipesh's body, and Revathi's intense desire to give in. Woof! Great!

slommler said...

Oh my! What intensity! Woohoo!!! I wasn't sure there which way she would go. Well written!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Mason Canyon said...

Awesome, enjoyed your post very much.

Mason
Thoughts in Progress

Tessa Conte said...

Great stuff, completely pulled me in! I think I let my cake burn... oops

Jaycee said...

LOL. I enjoyed reading this internal conflict, "should I or should I not?"

Not Hannah said...

*Fans self.*

Excellent.

WELCOME TO MY WORLD OF POETRY: said...

An excellent write, very much enjoyed.

Have a good day.
Yvonne,

Tara said...

Very intense. I'm drawn to your characters, and would love to read this story.

Talli Roland said...

Loved this! You can feel the intensity. And I wanted to read more, which is always a good sign!

Ann said...

Very intense. Loved it.

Raquel Byrnes said...

That was so restrained, yet so smoldering, I had to check if my glasses were fogged up! Wow. Great inner debate...wonderful dialogue.

Dawn Embers said...

Very nice work. I think this is an excellent example of internal conflict. We get into the main character and her thoughts, particularly in the beginning. Well done.

Mary McDonald said...

Oh man, I feel like Paris Hilton, but, that was hot! Loved how she debated, and then when she made the move, it was without any doubt or coyness. It shows what kind of character she is. When she makes a decision, she doesn't go half-way. Great job!

Slushpile Slut said...

Well.Well.Well. I'm so glad she gave in to him! Nice buildup and my fave line(s) is-She stared out of the window, concentrating on a blue flap of tarpaulin fluttering from a solitary balcony on an unfinished skyscraper. If she stared hard enough, would that patch of blue give her the answers she was seeking? Keep it up Rayna!! Nice work!

sarahjayne smythe said...

Very intense. Great dialogue and flow here. I liked your characters and would like to know more about them. :)

Candyland said...

Nice build-up! As wrong as it is, I wanted her to give in:)

Jemi Fraser said...

That's a great internal conflict! Awesome :)

Donna Hole said...

Now that's internal conflict at its most distressing. I work with mostly women, a few men - and I'm single. Work place romance, to tabu, and so enticing.

.........dhole

Tina Lynn said...

*sigh* That was frickin' sweet! Except I think she just made her life suck, but-oh, well-a good kisser is hard to find:)

Jan Morrison said...

ah - the build up and the release. By god, I think you've got it! (music from My Fair Lady swells)

Dokemion said...

Practice makes perfect! The more you flirt, the easier it will be.

Tagged: ways to flirt

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ Jessica - thank you for the thumbs up. One of my favourite scenes from the WiP- when I was writing it on the local train, I actually had her emotions flitting across my face - rather embarassing I can tell you.
Thank you for starting the Blog Fest. And I will visit all the blogs soon.

@ SueAnn/ Mason/ Jaycee/ Heather/ Yvonne/ Talli/ Ann/ Raquel/ Dawn/ Jemi/
- thank you.

@ Tessa - sorry about the cake ;-)

@ Tara - hopefully, there would be something worth sharing.

@ Mary - I don't think she would do anything by half-measures

@ Slushpile - thank you so much. That is my favourite bit too- needless to say it is true from life.

@ Sarahjayne - I hope I have more to share soon

@ Candyland - you do end up rooting for her, don't you?

@ Donna - I was in an office similar to yours- couldn't take it for too long. I need men around me at the workplace.

@ Tina - am I giving too much away when I say that things work out well in the end

@ Jan - one of my favourite songs that.

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