Monday, October 25, 2010

A 'Rewind' button in your life?

This post is inspired by a question that Margot Kinberg placed on her blog - "If you had the chance to go back and change one thing in your life, would you, and what would it be?"

'Rewind' means going back in time and doing something differently from how it has been done. Tempting, isn't it, to ask for that power?
But is that all it is made out to be?  You can choose not to date the guy who later hurt you, but you can't transform yourself from the geek to the glamour doll even if you wanted to. Avoiding the heartache would have been worth it, you may think, but can you be sure you will not end up meeting someone worse?

No 'Rewind' button for me. I'd rather make choices and not look back.

_____
drabble is a story told in exactly 100 words.

28 comments:

Clarissa Draper said...

That's a wise choice. We wish we could do it if there was no risk but we know there always will be.

CD

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Who we are now is based on our past decisions, so we'd mess ourselves up if we went back and changed something.

Mary said...

There are too many wonderful things in my life that may not be here if I went back to change something. Changing a mistake would never be worth the sacrifice of my blessings.

Jules said...

Every time I use my rewind button on the remote it sticks and I end up somewhere I did not want to be. :) about the same don't you think?
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Saumya said...

I agree. How do we know that we would not have made worse choices? Everything that we have done has gotten us to where we are now.

Helen Ginger said...

I think it's for the best that we can't go back. I'd end up going back again and again trying to get it right. And what would be right? Once you make a change, it changes the future and you might screw up other things because of the change you made.

Karen Walker said...

I used to wish I could go back and change things. But if I hadn't married the man who was emotionally abusive and didn't love me, I wouldn't have my wonderful son. And if I hadn't been business partners with a man who was playing out Pygmalion with me, I wouldn't have had the successful career I had in PR. So no, I wouldn't rewind. I ended up exactly where i'm supposed to be because of all the choices.

Karen

LTM said...

I have always been very "what happens in your life makes you who you are" so don't change anything...

still, there was this one time I unfairly accused a friend of something she didn't do. But I didn't believe her and we had an enormous fight. She was my best friend, and later I found out I was wrong...

I would go back and change that night again and again and again... :o\

Margot Kinberg said...

Rayna - Oh, how kind you are to mention my blog post!! :-). That's so very nice of you....and how wise your Drabble is! If we could start over again and "rewind," we could very well end up in a worse place, anyway. Much better to live with what is...

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ Clarissa- there really can't be a situation where there is no risk, can there?

@ Alex- precisely. I am who I am because of all that happened in my life, and I like myself too much to risk changing anything.

@ Mary- so true. We should print out what you said and tag it to a softboard- "Changing a mistake would never be worth the sacrifice of my blessings."

@ Jules- *giggle*
Or the undo button on the computer- so often you end up having to redo something you undo-ed by mistake.

@ Saumya- precisely. Because what we do not get with the rewind button is wisdom.

@ Helen- so very, very true. Even the smallest change can have huge repercussions.

@ Karen- you have been through a lot, haven't you, Karen. And yet, you have made peace with it all. I wish I could be half as wise as you.

@ Leigh - yes, those are the changes I would want to make. Those hurts we caused unintentionally to people we love.

@ Margot- your blog post was wise- I merely said it again in different words. Thank you.

Dyche Designs said...

It's funny, I've often thought that if I could turn back the clock I wouldn't have stayed with an ex of mine for 9 years . . . think is I probably wouldn't have met my husband if that had been the case. We may not love every aspect of our past but it makes us who we are.

Michele Emrath said...

I can choose not to rewind, but I can't help myself from looking back. The best thing I can do is to look back, then shrug off the regrets. You're right, we can't change the parts that make us who we are, and if we alter certain events, who knows if we'd end up with what we want? I loved Margot's post today, too, and your spin on it is just as great.

Michele
SouthernCityMysteries

ladyfi said...

I agree. A rewind button won't save us from making mistakes. I believe that bad situations are learning experiences and what really matters is not to avoid them, but how we react to them.

Erin said...

I agree with you: no rewinding. How drastically could changing one little event alter the course of my life? I'd rather let my mistakes and let-downs be part of my past.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

It's not what I did but what I didn't do. Then again, I would've be the same person now if I had.

Aleta said...

I guess the only regret that I have is that I wish I had met Greg earlier. But then... I wouldn't be the "me" of now that he fell in love with, would he like the "me" of then? Questionable... we all change.

Jane Kennedy Sutton said...

Being an author, I realize how many tiny things would be affected by changing one major thing with a rewind button. I might push it for one of my characters, but not for myself.

Deb and Barbara said...

I've often pondered the "rewind" and have to agree with you. As tempting as some choices would be to undo, I absolutely believe they got me to where I am. And that's better not worse!
B
The Middle Ages

Mason Canyon said...

That's what I wondered too. Would I need a do-over for my do-over?

Mason
Thoughts in Progress

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ Kathryn- so true. The bad is what you sometimes need to go through to get the good.

@ Michele- that is a fantastic way of looking at it. I like thinking of the What Ifs, but leave it at that.

@ Fiona - you said it. How you react to things is more important than what actually happens.

@ Erin- even really small changes can have huge impact. I would rather not take chances.

@ Diane- so true.

@ Aleta- precisely. Even the people you meet are the people you meet at that point in time.

@ Jane- I would love doing that for any of my characters.

@ Barbara- tempting it is, but I am happy being me.

@ Mason- I think we are happier with what we have become.

Stephen Tremp said...

I agree in that I would rather make choices and not look back. That being said, If I could go back and tell myself to do something different I would not have smoked cigarettes. I stopped a long time ago. But its totally stupid, looks and smells stupid, and is, well, stupid. That's all.

Stephen Tremp

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ Stephan- yes, things like that we can definitely change.

dipali said...

I think accepting responsibility for one's choices and living with them as happily as possible is far more sensible than imagining "what if" scenarios!

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ Dipali - absolutely. What If is fun to indulge in for fun, but thats' about it.

slommler said...

I am with you! Make the choices and move on...much more exciting that way. And if I hadn't made the choices I had back then and experienced what I did...I wouldn't be who I am now. And I like me now!!
So I don't want the rewind button.
Hugs
SueAnn

Dorte H said...

I saw your comment on Margot´s blog yesterday, and I thought that you had expressed exactly what I felt!

I may think a lot before I make my decisions, but once they are made, I live with them!

Patricia Stoltey said...

The only thing I would change in my whole life? I would never start smoking cigarettes. It was very hard to stop (which I did 28 years ago), and I'm sure that's why I have so many airborne allergies today.

Rayna M. Iyer said...

@ SueAnn- precisely. I guess we are the lucky ones who love ourselves as we are, and recognise it our past that made us who we are.

@ Dorte- so true. Take time before making a decision, but once you do, stick to it- that is the easiest way to be.

@ Patricia- I am lucky something happened to make me stop smoking a year or two after I had started. But yes, that is one thing that we could all change.

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